Product Reviews by Various Characters...
Dec. 10th, 2016 12:40 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Character name: Tony Stark
Fandom: Marvel Avengers
Name of Item Being Reviewed: Hoverboard
Word Count: 51
0 stars. What the crap kind of lousy engineering and false advertising is going on here? Does not fly. Does not hover. Barely holds my weight. And even started smoking a bit. Junked it, bought raw materials and made one myself. Would not recommend this product to any Avenger, except maybe Hawkeye.
Character name: Arthur Weasley
Fandom: Harry Potter
Name of Item Being Reviewed: "Egg Beater"
Word Count: 65
5 stars. Marvelous find! It's planting time but our garden dirt is tougher than a dragon's skin. I saw this and had to have it! It broke up all the dirt and it only took me a week! Worked like a charm (just slower). Muggles invent such wonderful things! No idea why it is called by that name, though. Just another example of delightful whimsy!
Character name: Han Solo
Fandom: Star Wars
Name of Item Being Reviewed: Toy spaceship
Word Count: 52
1 star. This pile of junk was held together by glue and weak bolts. Returned immediately. I knew this was too good of a deal. Not life size and made from the cheapest plastic in the galaxy. Even a Wookie can see it's crap. Plus, there's no way that design could get up to light speed. More realism, please. Even the kid hated it.
Fandom: Marvel Avengers
Name of Item Being Reviewed: Hoverboard
Word Count: 51
0 stars. What the crap kind of lousy engineering and false advertising is going on here? Does not fly. Does not hover. Barely holds my weight. And even started smoking a bit. Junked it, bought raw materials and made one myself. Would not recommend this product to any Avenger, except maybe Hawkeye.
Character name: Arthur Weasley
Fandom: Harry Potter
Name of Item Being Reviewed: "Egg Beater"
Word Count: 65
5 stars. Marvelous find! It's planting time but our garden dirt is tougher than a dragon's skin. I saw this and had to have it! It broke up all the dirt and it only took me a week! Worked like a charm (just slower). Muggles invent such wonderful things! No idea why it is called by that name, though. Just another example of delightful whimsy!
Character name: Han Solo
Fandom: Star Wars
Name of Item Being Reviewed: Toy spaceship
Word Count: 52
1 star. This pile of junk was held together by glue and weak bolts. Returned immediately. I knew this was too good of a deal. Not life size and made from the cheapest plastic in the galaxy. Even a Wookie can see it's crap. Plus, there's no way that design could get up to light speed. More realism, please. Even the kid hated it.
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Date: 2016-12-10 02:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-12-11 06:28 am (UTC)xtuflkdv
Date: 2017-01-26 02:31 pm (UTC)